How to Say No to a Wedding Supplier Without Ghosting Them
In 2016, I wrote a heartfelt message about the importance of effective communication in the wedding industry. Today, as I revisit this topic, I’m reminded once again of its significance. It seems that the ever-revolving wheel of time has brought us back to this day. The essence of my message remains unchanged – the value of a simple “no” in our industry.
While the years have passed, the sentiment remains as relevant as ever. Let’s delve into it once more, as we explore why open and considerate communication is crucial for wedding service providers and clients alike, preventing the frustrating phenomenon known as “ghosting.”
So here we go again …
It’s Okay to Say No to a Wedding Supplier
You’ve decided you don’t want to book me to film or photograph your wedding or elopement? That’s absolutely fine. I haven’t taken it personally… please believe me. In fact. Thank you so much for telling me ‘no’.
You’re actually more the type of client I want to work with than you know. Why? Because you have taken the time to get back to me. Perhaps you understand the importance of this for someone who owns a small business, like so many other suppliers in the wedding industry.
Why Wedding Suppliers Appreciate a Reply
Most of us go out of our way to respond to your enquiry as fast as we can. I often put together bespoke offers to meet the exacting requirements of you as clients or indeed for other planners who have requested a quote. A lot of the time, these requests come in over the weekend or in the evenings and we drop everything to get back to you with the information you have requested.
This takes up time. Valuable time. And often in our so-called free time (But as any wedding industry supplier will tell you, we don’t get much of that!)
So we do appreciate hearing back from you. Even if it is because you DON’T want to book us.
Feedback? Even better.
I won’t be offended if you had second thoughts and decided my storytelling wedding film style isn’t to everyone’s liking. That’s deliberate – I have worked very hard on offering something different from other videographers. My films don’t follow a formula, they are all different because they all tell the unique story of each individual couple.
‘I tell stories about people, places and love and they just so happen to be getting married.’
This also means I can escape getting lost in a sea of sameness and avoid being part of a window shopping or bargain hunters search for the ‘cheap’ or ‘reasonably priced’ wedding videographer.
Sometimes the reason is simply budget. Sometimes you prefer somebody else’s style. Sometimes your plans change.
That’s all completely fine.
I would far rather know than be left wondering whether you’re still considering working with me. And if I’m not the right filmmaker for you, I may even be able to point you towards someone who is.
I have been a wedding videographer for over 15 years and as well as running my own Facebook group of fabulous female filmmakers I also run a videography training academy where there are videographers of all styles for all budgets. As a renowned videographer and educational speaker I also know a lot of people in the wedding industry so I can help you find the right wedding videographer for you. And I have done so on countless occasions.
Images by Steven Rooney Photography, Captured By Katrina, Patrizia Corbianco
Because for me it’s all about customer satisfaction. You go away happy with the service you received from Story Of Your Day, whether you book me to film your wedding or not, and I have done a good job. If you ‘ghost’ me then I cannot help you and your search doesn’t become any easier.
Many others in the industry would do the same for you too so please, please …
Don’t leave us hanging.
I get it that you’re busy too and I understand that life gets in the way. I know you may have enquired with a long list of suppliers to pull your dream wedding together.
Why Ghosting Wedding Suppliers Matters
But just remember, some wedding suppliers might even be holding your date open when they hear about how wonderful your wedding sounds. Not in writing maybe. Just in their head.
I don’t ignore that enquiry because I don’t need it or because I am already booked for the date. In fact, I send recommendations of wedding videographers I’ve found who are available, to make your life easier.
There’s nothing in it for me. I just realise you might still appreciate my assistance.
And that’s why I am grateful when you help me, for telling me no.
How to Politely Tell a Wedding Supplier You’ve Chosen Someone Else
You don’t need to write a long explanation. You don’t need to justify your decision. And you certainly don’t need to feel guilty about saying no.
A simple message is enough:
“Thank you so much for taking the time to speak with us and send through all the information. We’ve decided to go in a different direction, but we really appreciate your time and help.”
That’s it.
If you’re comfortable sharing why you made your decision, feedback can be genuinely useful. But you don’t owe anyone a detailed explanation. What matters is simply closing the conversation.
A Simple No Is Always Better Than Silence
Wedding suppliers know that not every enquiry will become a booking. We speak to couples every week who ultimately choose somebody else. That’s part of running a business.
What makes a difference is knowing where we stand.
So if you’ve made your decision, send the email. Tell the photographer, filmmaker, planner, florist or venue that you’ve decided to go another way.
You don’t need an excuse. You don’t need an elaborate explanation. And you certainly don’t need to worry about hurting our feelings.
A simple, polite “no thank you” is enough.
I promise you. We can take it.
And we’ll genuinely appreciate you for telling us.
Still Looking for the Right Wedding Filmmaker?
If you’re still deciding who you want to capture your wedding, take your time. The right filmmaker should feel right for you, your plans and the way you want your story told.
With Story Of Your Day, every film starts with getting to know you. No templates. No formula. Just your story, told in a way that feels unmistakably yours.
